White (no sugar) thanks

I have a bit of an aversion to coloured toilet paper. I won't give it house room. My toilet paper has to be white. I could probably just about live with a cream-ish colour (but not if it's too yellow) if I had to. If there was some kind of shortage. Or green, funnily enough. But definitely not pink. Or blue.

Oh, but don't let that put you off inviting me to your house for tea. If you have non-white toilet paper (probably because you'd run out and that was all they had at the corner shop), I won't mind one bit. I'll probably just wait 'til I get home, to be on the safe side. So I won't have that second cup of tea, thank you anyway.