Where's Corporal Jones when we need him?

Tell me, dear reader... How do you make it clear that you're not panic-buying petrol when your car just happens to have run out at the same time as the 'crisis' starts?

Panic is, of course, the in-thing these days. We have so much to fear, and if we don't sort ourselves out sharpish, things will happen. And I don't see the next generation getting over this panic-fest in a hurry, if my glimpse of modern parenting methods are anything to go buy.

I was in a cafe the other day, when a young woman with two very small children went up to the counter to pay. Her little girl (probably about 2 years old) couldn't stand still and wandered out the door. Her mum called out to her, "Don't go outside on your own, you might be abducted!".

Of course, I believe it's good to instill a healthy fear of scary strangers from an early age. But the likelihood of this little girl even knowing what 'abducted' meant, let alone that being the most imminent danger in a busy high street, seems remote. "You might get lost" or "You might get run over" seems a much more appropriate warning. Perhaps it's me...

I work hard these days to suppress feelings of panic when I find myself in a supermarket without my non-plastic carrier bags, or when I leave home without my mobile phone.

I think the nervous energy created by all the scaremongering is probably contributing to something bad somewhere. Yeah, whatever...